Taking risks with a blind eye. Going through Plan A without a back-up plan. Quitting your job without a new one on the ready. Just going with the flow of life without anything concrete, any pre-arranged direction.

All of these were not me. Or at least I was expected to be not all these. By family. By friends. By acquaintances.

All of them expect me to be wise, smart, organized, and responsible. They expect me to be great in everything I do. They expect me to be successful in life. They expect me to be someone great, someone respected by everyone else.

The difference between childhood and adulthood. When you were a child, people praise you for getting three stars in your class activity. They smile so proudly when you get a grade of 85 and above much more when you are at the top ten. They are happy when you get up at the stage and join competitions.

When you’re grown up, they start expecting things from you. They expect perfect scores. They expect medals or certificate of distinction. They expect you to win all competitions.

And even if some of them don’t voice out their opinions on your failures— on your mishaps, all you’ll need to do is to look at the disappointment in their eyes or to see the slight, distorted twist of disapproval on their lips… or maybe the soft whispers when they think you’re not listening.

The difference between adulthood and maturity. You start to see that you are an individual. You have your own beliefs to live by. Your own personality to nurture. Your own gifts to use. Your own hopes and dreams to pursue.

You learn to separate the need to improve yourself from the inside out and to satisfy those who have always cheered you on to the point of suffocation.

You learn to compromise.

You learn to do your best in things but learn to accept that one way or another, you simply cannot make everyone happy.

You learn that being on the top is as much as for you than it is for them who expect you to succeed with flying colors. And that even if you fail, what you’ve learn from the experience is just as important as winning.

You learn that you can try with everything in you to not disappoint anyone, yet in the end, what you did in your life— what memories you made… what things you’ve achieve… all of these are on you. It will define who you are as a person.

It’s not them.

They are just bystanders. They are just onlookers. Watchers. Subscribers. Whatever you want to call it.

In the end, it’s all about you.

Will you spend the rest of your existence living a shell of a life or will you get out of your turtle house and do everything as you wanted it? To trust God that He will never leave you nor forsake you even if the rest of the world does? To stop being afraid of the unknown, of the whispers, of the looks of pity, disappointment and disapproval?

Life is not perfect and it never will be.

Life is not perfect and I don’t need it to be… because I am perfectly happy.