Yesterday, I've read one of the minibooklets we bought at the GCF Bible Conference. It talked about the story of Leah and Abigail.

When I was a kid, I remember thinking that Jacob's love for Rachel was so great. He was willing to work for her hand in marriage for seven years. And even after he was tricked into marrying her older sister Leah, he was willing to work another seven years for her. And even when she was having a hard time giving him children, he loved her still. I remember wanting to find my own Jacob when I grow up.

However, this is the only time I ever really paid attention to the story of Leah. Then, I realized that most of the time... sadness, impatience and discontentment are in our lives because we are looking at the wrong things.

For the longest time all she ever wanted was to be loved by Jacob but he was so in love with her sister Rachel. For the first three sons she kept hoping that he will finally love her.

She named their first son Reuben because she thinks God has seen her misery and she will finally be loved. Then she named the second Simeon, because the Lord has heard she was not loved so she was given another son. When her wishes did not come true, she named the third Levi. She thought that her husband will finally be attached to her for giving him three sons. She hoped each time, but she was still not loved by him like she wanted to be (Genesis 29:32-35).

On the fourth son, however, she decided to praise God instead. That's why she called him Judah (meaning "praising"). Leah could not change Jacob but she could change herself and steer her focus to find what can make her happy.

"Contentment will never come as long as we cling to the ideal and lose sight of the good gifts of God we have already received. "
And just like Leah, it doesn't end there. Every day we fight battles. Yes, we change focus but sometimes things remind us of what we want and what we don't have. Just like when Rachel's maidservant gave her two sons. Leah had to keep going and keep fighting.

When her fifth son was born she named him Issachar, meaning "reward" because she thinks him a reward from God. Her sixth son was named Zebulun, meaning "honor". By this time, she realized that expecting too much only leads to disappointments and heartaches so her only expectation was that her husband will treat her with honor because of their six sons. She was more realistic now and has accepted what may or may not happen (in her case, be loved by Jacob).

May God help us see the beauty and joy that we sometimes take for granted.

"We can focus on what we lack and be miserable or we can decide to focus on what we have and make up our minds to praise the Lord."